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Happy Birthday Heidi Montag
They grow up so fast. It's hard to believe that Heidi Montag is now 22 years old. Why just yesterday she was a dewy eyed teen dreaming of breast implants, now she's a fully grown blonde bimbo with a burgeoning career to match her implants.
What better way to celebrate her birthday than a photoshoot with her one true pimp, sorry, 'love', Spencer Pratt. Look how happy they are together. So sweet. So Christian. So Pure. So unbelievably fake that there's just not enough vomit in the world.
You know, this raises questions. What happens to your reality when you fake your entire life? Does Heidi go home to an empty set and just eat Cheetos until Spencer or the producers of 'The Hills' trot her out like a show pony? Or is she perhaps secretly a Russian spy with a cover so bad nobody could possibly suspect her? I recommend water boarding her until we discover the truth. Heidi's a republican, it's what she'd want to happen.
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