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Paris Hilton Gets Another Year Older
A happy birthday was had by Paris Hilton over the weekend. She is now all of seven and twenty years old, and still unmarried. In the olden days that would make her a confirmed spinster. These days the only thing confirmed about Paris is that she has STD's. Paris appears to have had a quiet birthday, there are no mentions of midgets riding goats in the reports so far, and I am guessing she kept her clothes on all night as well.
In other Paris news, practically nobody went to see her film when it opened over the weekend. 'The Hottie and the Nottie', box office sales were dismal, and the film only made $25,500 in ticket sales at over 100 locations combined. In film terms, that's the equivalent of working for a day at McDonalds and only taking home a cheeseburger as compensation.
Don't worry about Paris though, she has plenty of other crappy merchandise to flog to the public before they finally get sick of her.
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