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Full uncensored list
Hilton Puts Off Womb Developments
Category:
gossip
| Online: September 07 2008
Paris has decided not to become impregnated after realizing that babies = no life. Paris shared her revelation with Hollyscoop, saying: "You know right now I´m just focusing on my business. A lot of traveling around the world. There´s no time for a baby right now... I would love to one day, but for right now it wouldn’t be right to have a kid because I don’t have the time..."
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Paris Bites The Hand That Feeds Her
Category:
gossip
| Online: September 03 2008
Poor Paris is bitching at the paparazzi again. Cue whiny Paris Hilton quote: “It is annoying when they are always showing up at your house. I think it is fine at like a movie premiere or an event when they are supposed to be there. But when it is every single day it just gets really tiring. There is nothing you can do about it. They want you to lash out at them so I never do. I have never done that and I never will.”
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Paris Is A Puppet Master
Category:
gossip
| Online: August 24 2008
Paris Hilton´s latest reality series, "Paris Hilton´s My New BFF" is set to hit the airwaves shortly, so Paris felt the need to make a public announcement which pretty much admits she loves to manipulate people with money, and has no idea about real friendship whatsoever.
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Heidi Klum is Topless
Category:
gallery
| Online: August 08 2008
Heidi Klum wants to make sure she doesn´t have any silly looking tanlines on her chest, and does some more topless sunbathing. I like that, tanlines are lame.
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Heidi Klum
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Cuntry Fans Don´t Want Jessica
Category:
gossip
| Online: June 23 2008
Jessica Simpson is currently trying to transition over into the country music scene, but its not going well. At her first performance in Wisconsin she was booed heavily by the crowd who were as unimpressed with her singing as her lame attempts to seem like one of them. Jess told the crowd: "I don´t know what your perception is of Jessica Simpson or what tabloid you buy..."
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Paris Strikes Out With Ronaldo
Category:
gossip
| Online: June 21 2008
Paris Hilton may be claiming to be loving domestic bliss with her diminutive Madden brother, but that´s not stopping her throwing herself at any remotely hot soccer superstar that crosses her path. The Daily Mail´s sources report that Paris Hilton tried to seduce British soccer star Christian Ronaldo when he was in LA over the weekend, but failed miserably.
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Paris Hilton Is A Single White Female
Category:
gossip
| Online: June 15 2008
But not in the single sense, more in the 1992 movie sense where one desperate woman tries to steal another woman´s life by emulating her in every way. According to rumors, Nicole Richie is getting very sick of Paris Hilton who has gone out of her way to copy almost every aspect of her life, including dating her fiancee´s brother and moving in next door to her.
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Paris Hilton
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Sharon Stone Blames Chinese For The Earthquake
Category:
gossip
| Online: May 29 2008
Old people are awesome. They can say whatever they want and get away with it because they´re old. Sharon Stone is reveling in her elderly status by claiming that the Chinese earthquake which has killed over 65,000 people, including many small children may have been the result of karma because Chinese people are big jerks.
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Paris Has No Friends And No Ass
Category:
gossip
| Online: April 13 2008
In an amusing anticlimax to all the build up for the first auditions for Paris´ new MTV reality show where she selects a new best friend from a selection of unknown hopefuls, hardly anybody actually bothered to leave their house and go down to the audition. According to onlookers, there were less than 40 people at the auditions.
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Cameron Diaz Is More Woman Than You Can Handle
Category:
gossip
| Online: April 02 2008
Here´s a lady we haven´t heard from in a while. She was cradle snatching Justin Timberlake for a while, but then Mr. Douchey McLame moved on to Jessica Biel´s fine ass and Cameron faded into obscurity, or was trampled in a stampede of paparazzi when she mistakenly got between them and Britney´s crotch. Now that that´s all over, Cameron is becoming popular enough for Us Magazine to interview, and what an interview it is.
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woman
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Paris Hilton Falls Over, Gets Walked Over
Category:
gossip
| Online: April 01 2008
Paris Hilton became equilibriumly challenged over the weekend and fell over in Prague. Prague happens to be one of the few places in the world where real Absinthe (an alcoholic beverage blamed for the births of malformed Swiss children) is legal, so this may have been an alcohol related incident, or it may be evidence that Paris is forgetting what her legs do apart from spread.
Tags:
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Paris Hilton Is Sickening In Love
Category:
gossip
| Online: March 15 2008
This story hasn´t been covered much here because a) it is Paris Hilton without her tits out, so who cares, and b) because its probably a hoax anyway, but it now turns out that Paris and Benji are denying that their uber lame relationship is a set up. Some people have claimed that it is all a joke for Ashton Kutcher´s latest tv travesty, ´Pop Fiction´, but according to Paris, their love is the real deal.
Tags:
Paris Hilton
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Paris Hilton Publicly Humiliated Again
Category:
gossip
| Online: March 05 2008
Paris Hilton went out on the weekend, once again trying to prove that she has turned over a new leaf and is a good girl now. Her stunt of lamery involved walking around with a monk and being blessed by him in front of the paparazzi. I don´t know what is going on in Paris´ head that she thinks having a monk bless her outside of a cafe makes her look good...
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Paris Hilton
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Want A Date With Scarlett Johansson?
Category:
gossip
| Online: March 05 2008
Scarlett Johansson fans are in luck! It turns out that a whole bunch of people in America and other places are starving and diseased, and so Scarlett is auctioning herself off to the highest bidder in order to get some money to help feed them.
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Scarlett Johansson
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Paris Has A New Boyfriend
Category:
gossip
| Online: February 28 2008
If you thought Paris launching a reality tv show in order to find a boyfriend was sad, wait until you hear who her new boyfriend is. I´ll give you a clue, his brother knocked up super elf girl Nicole Richie. Yeah, that´s right, Paris Hilton is now dating Nicole Richie´s boyfriend´s brother, Benji Madden.
Tags:
Paris Hilton
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Would You Be Paris´ Friend?
Category:
gossip
| Online: February 27 2008
Things must be getting really hard for Paris Hilton, as she now sinks to even lower levels of lamery with her latest television product which will apparently be a show where Paris tries to find a new friend. Really. I am not making this up.
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Paris Hilton
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Akon Fans Would Like To Burn To Death
Category:
gossip
| Online: February 25 2008
Akon´s never struck me as being the sharpest tool in the shed, but it turns out that his fans aren´t too smart either. Akon was at a concert in Copenhagen ( a concert being held in a mall, which I guess shows what a huge fan base he has in Denmark,) when a fire alarm was set off. Most people have a natural fear of burning in flames, but evidently Akon fans are missing this particular evolutionary quirk.
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Pete Doherty Plays For Kiddies
Category:
gossip
| Online: February 15 2008
Pete Doherty, the guy who gave his kitten crack and who spends most of his time bouncing in and out of court for various offenses, has recently taken a new direction in his career and is now entertaining at children´s parties. Don´t think that that he has priced himself out of range of the average family either, Pete recently performed at a child´s party for just $200.
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Natalie Portman Is Bad At Selling Shoes
Category:
gossip
| Online: February 15 2008
Paris and Natalie both launched shoe lines in the past week, but while Paris´ natural attention whore talent made her event a great success, Natalie Portman struggled to pretend to be interested in her own lame product.Page Six reported that she showed up 45 minutes late to the event, gave only 15 minutes of interviews, and then showed up to the party that accompanied the launch with only five minutes to go.
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Natalie Portman
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Amy Winehouse´s Rehab Woes
Category:
gossip
| Online: January 29 2008
Amy Winehouse is in rehab, and pissed that she is under investigation for smoking crack. Not only that , but she´s also pissed at Pete Doherty and blames him for her troubles. Interestingly enough, the fact she took 6 Valium and then smoked crack in the first place appears not to have occurred to her as being the cause of her problems.
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Everything Is Jessica Simpson´s Fault
Category:
gossip
| Online: January 16 2008
Jessica Simpson is being blamed by Cowboys fans for Tony Romo´s latest poor performance, even though she didn´t even attend the game. Apparently just going on vacation with her to Mexico was enough to cause the latest loss.
Tags:
Jessica Simpson
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Steroids Explain Janice Dickinson
Category:
gossip
| Online: January 13 2008
Finally, some explanation for the anomaly that is Janice Dickinson. At last we know what turned her from a winsome, sweet, drug addicted supermodel to a screeching raving loon compelled to repeat the words “I was the world´s first supermodel” over and over again until she passes out or every one leaves. Steroids are apparently to blame.
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Janice Dickinson
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Criss Angel Blames Britney
Category:
gossip
| Online: October 25 2007
According to Criss Angel, the reason why Britney´s VMA performance was lacking any magic was the fact that Britney decided that she wanted to go in another direction. A more drunken, less difficult direction. As much as I´d love to slam Criss Angel, his story is completely plausible. What is it with Britney that she makes scumbag men look positively decent?
Tags:
Criss Angel
Britney Spears
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Kate Beckinsale Gets The Terrorist Treatment
Category:
gossip
| Online: October 07 2007
If there is anything that is super fun to do these days, it´s fly on a commercial airline. It was so lame when you could just wander through security with a sandwich and a lite beer and only worry about flying into a mountain, not exploding in mid-air due to a terrorist attack. Kate Beckinsale obviously couldn´t find a better way to get where she was going...
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Kate Beckinsale
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